Marriage Monday: Simple changes that make a BIG difference

This past Tuesday, we read a letter in the Dear Abby column in our local newspaper. Signed “Happier Than Ever,” the author of the letter shared how a simple change in routine THAT COST ABSOLUTELY NOTHING transformed her marriage.

After reading the column Jill and I decided it was good enough to share as a Marriage Monday post.  Let’s see what we can learn from this very wise mom:

DEAR ABBY: So often I read about troubled marriages in your column. May I share with you something that my husband and I started doing that has transformed what I thought was a good marriage into a blissful one?

One day, after complaining that we had no quality time together — we rarely talked, much less made love — my husband suggested we turn off the television and offered to give me a massage.

Ever since, four or five times a week, once the children are in bed, we go into our bedroom, take off our clothes and give each other long massages. Sometimes we spend the entire time in conversation, other times we savor the peace and quiet. Sometimes we make passionate love; other times we fall asleep naked in each other’s arms, completely content.

It doesn’t matter how it turns out; it’s wonderful and it has made the rest of our lives less stressful and more enjoyable. Our sex life is better than before the children came, and we sleep in the nude more often.

I hope you’ll print this. More marriages would take a turn for the better if couples made time for each other and discovered the wonders of massage. — HAPPIER THAN EVER

What we loved about this was the simplicity of the decision they made to turn off the television and INVEST in their marriage.

Over the years, we have used this strategy in different ways.  Many years ago we would turn the TV off and play Yahtzee…just the two of us.  In the summer, we step away from the TV and the computers a couple of nights a week and sit out on the porch swing after the kids are in bed and talk.  In the past year, our Craig’s list hot tub has provided a little getaway for us right in our own yard.

It’s always a challenge to start a new routine…but when it comes to our marriage it’s worth taking the challenge!  Yes, you might have to give us some computer time or your favorite television show.  But isn’t your marriage worth it?

Investing in your marriage doesn’t have to cost a dime…it just requires a little bit of intentionality.  Don’t you think “intentionally investing” in your marriage might be the best Valentine’s gift you could give each other this year?

What about you? What “doesn’t cost a dime” changes have you or are you making to invest in your marriage?